For a man is known by his children

It is certain that a child's good or evil conduct in life depends on his being brought up well or ill. Nature itself teaches every parent to attend to the education of his offspring. He who has given them being ought to endeavour to make life useful to them. God gives children to parents, not that they may assist the family, but that they may be brought up in the fear and love of God, and be directed in the way of eternal salvation. "We have," says St. John Chrysostom, "a great deposit in children; let us attend to them with great care." Children have not been given to parents as a gift which they may dispose of as they please, but as a trust, for which, if lost through their negligence, they must render an account to God. The Scripture tells us that when a father observes the Divine law, both he and his children shall prosper. That it may be well with thee and thy children after thee, when thou shalt do that which is pleasing in the sight of God (Deut. xii. 25). The good or bad conduct of a parent may be known from the kind of life his children lead. For by the fruit the tree is known (Matt. xii. 33). A father who leaves a family, when he departs this life, is as if he had not died; because his children remain, and exhibit his habits and character. His father is dead, and he is as if he were not dead; for he hath left one behind him that is like himself (Ecclus. xxx. 4). When we find a son addicted to blasphemies, to obscenities, and to theft, we have reason to suspect that such, too, was the character of the father. For a man is known by his children (Ecclus. xi. 30).

Hence Origen says that on the Day of Judgment parents shall have to render an account for all the sins of their children. Hence, he who teaches his son to live well, shall die a happy and tranquil death. He that teacheth his son... when he died he was not sorrowful, neither was he confounded before his enemies (Ecclus. xxx. 3-5). And he shall save his soul by means of his children; that is, by the virtuous education he has given them. She shall be saved through child-bearing (1 Tim. ii. 15). But, on the other hand, a very uneasy and unhappy death shall be the lot of those who have laboured only to increase the possessions, or to multiply the honours of their family; or who have sought only to lead a life of ease and pleasure, but have not watched over the morals of their children. St. Paul says that such parents are worse than infidels. But if any man have not care of his own, and especially of those of his house, he hath denied the faith, and is worse than an infidel (1 Tim. v. 8). Were fathers or mothers to lead a life of piety and continual prayer, and to communicate every day, they would be damned if they neglected the care of their children. Would to God that certain parents paid as much attention to their children as they do to their horses! How careful are they to see that their horses are fed and well trained! And they take no pains to make their children attend to Catechism, hear Mass, or go to Confession. "We take more care," says St. John Chrysostom, "of mules and horses than of the children."

If all fathers fulfilled their duty of watching after the education of their children, we should have but few crimes and few death penalties. By the bad education parents give to their offspring, they cause their children, says St. John Chrysostom, to rush into many grievous vices; and thus they deliver them up to the hands of the executioner. Hence, in Lacedemon, a parent, as being the cause of all the irregularities of his children, was justly punished for their crimes with greater severity than the children themselves. Great, indeed, is the misfortune of the child whose parents are vicious and incapable of bringing up their children in the fear of God, and who, when they see their children engaged in dangerous friendships and in quarrels, instead of correcting and chastising them, rather take compassion on them and say: "What can be done? They are young and must take their course." Oh what wicked maxims! What a cruel education! Do you hope that when your children grow up they will become holy? Listen to what Solomon says: A young man, according to his way. Even when he is old, he will not depart from it (Prov. xxii. 6). A young man who has contracted a habit of sin will not abandon it even in his old age. His bones, says Job, shall be filled with the vices of his youth, and they shall sleep with him in the dust (Job xx. 11). When a young person has lived in evil habits, his bones shall be filled with the vices of his youth, so that he will carry them with him to death; and the impurities, blasphemies and hatred to which he was accustomed in his youth will accompany him to the grave, and sleep with him after his bones shall be reduced to dust and ashes. It is very easy, when they are young, to train up children to habits of virtue; but, when they have come to manhood, it is just as difficult to correct them, if they have learned habits of vice.