Seeking God in activity

PRESENCE OF GOD - I leave all exterior activity to become recollected before Jesus, and I beg Him to teach me how to preserve this interior spirit, even in the midst of my occupations.

MEDITATION

1. St. John of the Cross teaches the soul that would attain quickly to holy recollection: “Never undertake anything, however good and full of charity it may seem... without being ordered by obedience” (P, 11). In this way one is certain of acting solely according to the will of God; and God’s will cannot permit the duties which it requires of us—even though they are absorbing and disturbing—to become a hindrance to the recollection of the soul in Him. “If one acts only by obedience and under obedience, it is God who commands, and it does not seem to me that He can destroy His own work,” that is, His intimate union with the soul, affirms St. Teresa Margaret.

When exterior activity is wholly regulated by obedience, not only is the risk of acting through self-love lessened, but also that of exposing oneself temporarily to distractions, for in every occupation one has the certainty of embracing the holy will of God. And if one embraces the holy will of God, there can be no danger of separation from Him, no danger of distracting the mind from its continual orientation toward Him. Union of the soul with God is not accomplished so much in the sweetness of prayer, as in embracing perfectly the holy will of God.

2. “We must needs be careful, in doing good works, even those of obedience and charity, not to fail to have frequent inward recourse to our God” (T.J. F, 5). This is a further condition to be observed in order to prevent external activity from disturbing interior recollection. “I will never do anything with haste or agitation.” This was the constant resolution of St. Teresa Margaret who, in the midst of a surprising amount of activity, always maintained “a peaceful, calm attitude, which showed her perfect self-control in each one of her actions” (Sp). Such an attitude implies keeping complete control of oneself and of one’s activity so as to avoid the danger of being dominated and carried away by this activity. Those who rush headlong into action, without taking precautions, will soon lose their calm, become agitated, unable to recollect themselves, and their activity will become ever more and more absorbing and demanding.

Jesus chided Martha, not because she gave herself to activity, but because she was too anxious about it: “Martha, Martha, thou art careful, and art troubled about many things” (Lk 10,41). God wants activity, but not anxiety, for even in activity, the soul should attend to “the one thing necessary,” that is, union with Him. Therefore, as soon as a soul perceives that it is beginning to lose its interior calm, it should interrupt its work, if possible, at least for an instant, and retire into its interior with God. These brief moments of pause, frequently repeated, will accustom it, little by little, to keep calm and recollected in God, even in the most absorbing activity.

COLLOQUY

O Lord, here at Your feet, in the light of Your divine presence, I wish to examine my occupations sincerely, to find out if they are really all regulated by holy obedience. You have made me understand that when I act solely on my own initiative, with no real motive of obedience or charity, my actions can very easily draw me away from You; I am drawn away either because I occupy in activity that time which I ought to dedicate to prayer, or because in doing what pleases me, I often do nothing but follow my selflove, my natural tendency toward activity, my own ideas, my own will. In these cases, I am united not to Your will but to mine; not to You, but to my self-love. O my God, I beseech You, free me from such great danger! To weary myself, to suffer in order to do Your will, to unite myself to You—yes, with Your help I wish to do this always, O Lord. But to weary myself and to suffer in order to do my own will, would be truly foolish, and all the more so because my soul would pay dearly for it.

Guard me, O Lord, from such foolishness, and do not permit me to be so blind as to squander my strength uselessly, to the detriment of my interior life. O Lord, give me a “passion” for Your will, so that I may never will or do anything except what You will, what You ask of me in the commands and wishes of my superiors or in the advice of my spiritual director. Nothing else should exist for me, for I want You and Your will alone.

O my God, help me also not to let myself be dominated and carried away by activity. Help me, O peaceful One, to keep myself always calm and recollected, always at peace in Your presence, even in the midst of the most intense activity. This continual calm and interior peace alone will permit me to gather all the powers of my soul and to keep them fixed on You, despite the many demands of exterior activity. O my Jesus, is not this what You meant to say when You spoke to Magdalen about the one thing necessary? “How well this great Saint understood! Illumined by the light of faith, she recognized her God beneath the veil of His humanity, and in silence and in the union of her powers, she listened to His word; she could chant, ‘My soul is always in my hands’ and also that little word Nescivi! I knew not. Yes, she knew nothing but You, my God! No matter what noise or disturbance went on around her, Nescivi! She could have accusations made against her, Nescivi! ” (E.T. II, 2). Even when she was obliged to leave Your adorable feet to perform some task, her heart remained fixed on You. And after she had finally found You risen again, she had to leave You, at Your command, to run to announce Your resurrection to the Apostles, but her soul remained established in an attitude of profound calm, recollected and concentrated upon You. With Your help, may I too so live!